Risk-Taking for Your Children: How Much is Enough?
Some time ago, I wrote a post about a TED talk in which the speaker recommended that parents allow their children to engage in risky behavior, for example, play with fire, own a pocket knife, throw spears, take apart appliances, and drive a car. I agreed with his views though I also suggested that, because he wasn’t a parent, it was easy for him to say. In contrast, as parents, we all struggle with a fundamental question: How much risk for our children?
This question is one I ask myself often because I believe that parents these days are far too protective of their children. Many parents ‘bubble wrap’ their kids with the best of intentions to safeguard them from life’s dangers. I would argue , however, that these parents are actually doing their children a disservice by not allowing them to gain experiences that will build confidence and instill resilience that will be essential for success and happiness later in life.
This question arose in my mind over the weekend as my wife and I had some fun adventures with our two daughters (ages 8 and 6). Our girls rode their bikes, swam, and climbed high on play structures. At a more mundane level, we also hung around the house during which time they climbed up on the kitchen counters, cut vegetables with a sharp knife, and helped my wife cook dinner on the stove. Additionally, our daughters rode their scooters on the sidewalk in front of our house and went for a walk around the neighborhood by themselves. Next weekend, we’re going up to the mountains to ski.
Read MoreTaylor Radio Interview about Seattle’s QB and Confidence
I was interviewed by KIRO radio in Seattle the other day about the Seahawk’s quarterback, Russell Wilson, and how he was able to maintain his confidence and composure after fumbling on the first play of the NFC Championship game against San Francisco. In the interview, we also explore whether professional athletes are different from regular […]
Read MoreGreat Video on Positive Self-talk and Imagery for Ski Racers
Here’s a link to a great video in which three of Canada’s top female ski racers demonstrate and discuss how they use positive self-talk and mental imagery to prepare them for success.
Read MoreThree Ways to Raise Competent — and Confident — Children
It’s one thing to say you want to raise competent children. It’s an entirely different thing to know how to raise competent children. This post explores three practical ways in which you can help your children to become competent—and confident—people. Catchphrases for Competence My 8-year-old, Catie, came up with our family’s catchphrase for competence when […]
Read MoreAre Your Expectations Helping or Hurting Your Ski Racing Children?
Setting expectations for your ski racing children is an essential responsibility to help your children ski their fastest and achieve their goals. Expectations communicate messages to your children about what’s important to you and establish a standard toward which your children can strive. But expectations can be double-edged swords. They can be a tremendous benefit […]
Read MoreSki Racers, Get Up to Speed for This Season: A Review
Hopefully, you’ve spent the summer getting ready for this winter of racing. If so, you should be stronger, better technically, and more mentally prepared than ever before. You’re now entering the final stage of preparations for the upcoming race season with a final period of conditioning followed by getting back on snow and tuning up […]
Read MoreThree Steps to Athletic Success
I have been thinking a great deal about what it takes for athletes to achieve what I consider to be an essential goal in all of your efforts, namely, when your game, match, round, race, or other type of competition concludes, you are make two statements: “I was as prepared as I could be to […]
Read MoreDo You Send “Dark” Messages of Love to Your Children?
Of course you love your children and would never consciously reward your children with love and attention when they, for example, first sit up or walk, score their first goal, or get an A on a school test, or punish their failures with anger or rejection. The challenge is to become aware of the unconscious, […]
Read MoreIn Sports, Think Now, So You Don’t Have to Think Later
I just returned from Europe where I spent a week working with a group of highly ranked U.S. athletes during their off-season prep period. After a few days, the feedback I was getting from them was that I was really getting into their heads and causing them to think a lot, in fact, to a few of them, think a bit too much.
This wasn’t a surprise to me as I hear this frequently. Between my mental skills work with athletes during practices, one-on-one sessions, team talks (in which we discussed a relevant sport topic each evening), and daily imagery sessions, the athletes were getting their minds stuffed with the mental side of their sport. I was definitely making them think more than they were accustomed. But that is, in fact, my job: to get the athletes I work with uncomfortable, push them outside of what they are used to, and think about things that will take them to the next level. Yes, admittedly, it can feel a bit overwhelming at first, but after a few days, they got used to it and figured out how to incorporate my approach into their usual training regimen.
Read MoreMental Training Begins in the Gym
Most sport psychologists work with athletes on the mental side of their sport in an office setting (usually one hour per week), providing them with mental tools that they can use during training and competitions. This approach makes about as much sense as a coach offering their athletes technical instruction and then telling them to go out onto the field, course, court, or what-have-you and work on it in practice. In either case, the transfer from inside to outside isn’t very good.
I have found the most productive work I do with athletes is during their actual practice sessions. I’m able to go to training with athletes and show them how to incorporate mental skills, such as intensity, focus, imagery, and routines, while they’re actually practicing.
But, over the last few years, I have discovered an even better setting in which athletes can begin to develop their mental skills: the gym. Yes, using mental skills as a part of your physical conditioning program is a great way to begin to ingrain those skills that will be of such benefit in the quality of your training and when you compete.
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