Values have gotten a bad rap. When most people think of values these days, they think of hot-button topics and the divisive battle between so-called “red-state” and “blue-state” values. They think of politicians, media “talking heads,” and other groups using values to push their own agendas. As America’s discussion of values has focused on these [...]
Self-esteem is the most misunderstood and misused developmental factor of the past thirty years. Child-rearing experts in the early 1970s decided that all of the efforts of our society should be devoted to helping children build self-esteem. I couldn't agree more. Children with high self-esteem have been found to perform better in school and sports, [...]
You probably know that popular culture is a truly destructive force in your children’s lives. In a recent survey, three-fourths of parents believed that materialism and the negative influences from television, movies, and music were a “serious problem” in raising children. Over 85 percent of parents believe that marketing contributes to children being too materialistic, [...]
NFL star Terrell Owens doing his outrageous touchdown dances. American Idol’s Simon Cowell humiliating well-intentioned—if not untalented—singers. Hip-hop artists who demean women in their music. There is no shortage of forces in popular culture that resist your efforts to teach your children the value of respect. It can sometimes feel like you’re being overwhelmed by [...]
Because of the messages of selfishness and disregard for others that popular culture communicates these days, your children aren’t likely to learn compassion on their own. You must nurture the ability to care about others in their early years. If the value of compassion isn’t evident in your daily lives, your children are less likely [...]
You’re under tremendous pressure these days to give your children every opportunity and advantage. Whether piano lessons at age four or being a part of a traveling soccer team at age eight, you feel compelled by popular culture to get your kids on the fast track as soon as possible, otherwise they’re going to be [...]
Perfectionism is one of the most destructive diseases among American children today. Perfectionism is a double-edged sword. One edge of the sword drives children to be perfect. These children push themselves to get straight A’s, be top athletes, and save the world on weekends. The other edge of the sword is that I have never [...]
One of the most frequent comments I get from parents is “I just want my kid to be happy.” Though an admirable and common objective, happiness is one of the most neglected family values in twenty-first-century America. Few parents grasp the essential meaning of happiness for their children and fewer still understand how they can [...]
One of the most powerful ways you can encourage your children to become successful, happy, and contributing people is to teach them good decision making and then to allow them to make their own decisions. The decisions that your children make as they approach adulthood dictate the people they become and the life paths they [...]
Play is becoming a dinosaur in the lives of children in 21st century America. According to studies, school-age children’s playtime decreased by 25 percent and older children’s playtime by 45 percent between 1981 and 1997. Unstructured outdoor activities also declined by 50 percent. Between school, homework, organized youth sports—which is no longer real play—music and [...]